More Frenzal Questions

Hey there Everyone. Sorry we've been so lazy of late, but, as usual, we're just plain lazy. Here's a bunch more questions answered and I'll get to the news page real soon. Cheers, Lindsay



hey my friend showed me one of your songs "ben is a cunt". great song, just broke up with my b/f ben, and yeah i can totaly relate. you guys are spot on. what was ure inspiration?

Quite obviously, your boyfriend was the inspiration for the song. We knew him long before you, and knew he was a cunt. The song was our way of warning you. Sadly, you only just heard the song. Oh well, you do what you can…

what is it you do you should write themes and when it does happen you can have the sounds you want then we stick it up johns howard arse!

See, it’s the absence of these kind of powerful political minds that I believe cost Labor the election. Hopefully with three years grace we can get people like this into the shadow ministry.

When you guys releasing new album? if your even working on one that is..

We releasing new album when we want to. Me hungry now.

hey Frenzal Rhomb i just wanna ask you's a question do you smoke weed? if yes you's are fuking legengs coz raging is phat. and tom i know dan wiggans from enuf sed he is my brothers friend.

Enuf Sed? Enough Said.

Will you play at my christening party?my question is basically my subject. but also how are you doing?

jaz

Dear jaz. Cheers for your letter. Firstly may I say congratulations on your Christening, and welcoming the baby Jesus into your heart. I guess it’s better late than never. And no, we shan’t be playing your christening, coz christianity is for losers. Cheers, Lindsay

dear frenzal
have you ever had any gay moments in the band like gordys forskin ever got court in your lip ring cause it gets me off or have you diped chocolate mmmmmmmm

Yes, yes we have. Thanks mum, Lindsay.

When are you guys playing in los angeles?, because I’d come to your show, and love it’s ass. My face would be so huge, several dicks would explode off of it, and an ass would be ignited by the fury that is frenzal bomb. My friend just farted, and it sucks, but im powering through it. So come to la, where things suck sometimes, but we all end up ok. Oh, and we’d offer you weed and aderol. Sorry to hear about john howard…I hear his dick is smaller than the average frenzal rhomb member dick.
With a glory that shames the ages,
Vasil oswald

Now once again, I don’t answer questions about future gigs, but this one really caught my eye. Mainly, what the fuck is aderol, and where can I get some? Cheers, Lindsay

Oi Jay,

I sent you an email a while back, but no answer.

Do you want to come to Byron for schoolies with us?

We will be doing a trip to Nimben also!

Get back to me!

Benj

Benj, unfortunately Jay isn’t around to answer your question, so I’ll field it for him. He would love to go on holiday with you, but not to Byron. See, his mother lives there, god bless her, and she’s a teacher, so going to Byron with you on Schoolies would be much more like going to school, or delving back into his teenage past, and believe me, no one wants to go there. Cheers, enjoy the midori and rohypnol, Lindsay.

if i call someone a magpie slut enough times do you think they would be interested in playing solitare with me??

I think the main thing to examine here is the fact that Solitaire is a game, denoted by it’s very name, to be played by one person alone, solo, hence solitaire. So even if, by your repeatedly calling someone Magpie Slut, they, for some unknown reason, suddenly decided they wanted to play Solitaire with you, they in fact couldn’t as it’s a game for only one person. Hope that cleared it up. Cheers, Lindsay


i was wonder what you thought of girl bands such as good charlotte and simple plan??
I love all God’s children.

how many albums have you brought out?

from andrew

Plenty. 6 I think. Let’s see. Coughing Up A Storm, Not So tough Now, Meet The Family, A Man’s Not A Camel, Shut Your Mouth, and Sans Souci. And For The Term Of Their Unnatural Lives. That’s 7. Fuck, how depressing…

TO Docter
Nice to see that you got your ass onto Chaser Decides the other night, fine work. Also we have been enjoying the antics of your radio program all throught the week. I am bored shitless other wise. how are you? i am actually suspended from school now with my friends. we are being idoits and eatting junk food to pass the time. Have you ever been suspended in your spelended schoooling years. What did you do in the spare time???????
we are bored just rang you up on the radio hope you enjoy the sounds of our voices
we enjoyed yours it was "tremendous"
as we sugested gargantous
love Maddy and Monica and Nannah Hannah


We went to italy on a school trip and now we are suspended for drinking and bored shitless at home if you were in our position what would you do?
love maddy and monica
p.s we missed you in melbourne thanks to the trip to italy, and you re the reason we went out to go find 18 year old rum so you fuckers got us into this and you are going to get us out.
you better help
pps our parents are crazy so if you don't see us at your next gig you will know why
pppppps we love you
pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppps please help us we are dead we are to young to die - i am only 15
p.s our parents are not aware of our drinking habbits and we dont want them to find out
please at least send us a picture of the docter dressed as a women to make us laugh
love maddy


Dearest Maddy, Monica and Nannah Hannah. I’m very sorry to hear of all your troubles, and my I kindly suggest some form of ecstasy and vodka suppository to remedy all that ails you. Cheers, Lindsay (I’m not a doctor)



Guys, why aren't u playing at homebake this year, my gf's devastated????????????

I know, you’ll have to finger her to some other awful music.


dearest frenzal boys


what tattoos do you each have adorning your sexy bodies?

cheers,

m e

We’ve got flames, and skulls, and other scary things; lounge settings, candelabras, all on fire of course. Various kanji characters meaning “stupid tourist” or “I got fucked over by a tattooist in Japan”, and of course thick XXXs all over our hands and necks. You know, the usual.

to whom it may not concern, where the fuck is my video? ibought a mans not a camel but i didnt get my video because of some lame arsed excuse the guy at the record store gave me im sick of the hard working australian guy getting pushed around by corperate thugs such as yourselves so cough up with my fucking video.
yours untruthfully matty mudskipper


Hey there Matt. My sincerest apologies for your loss. It could in fact be that A Man’s Not A Camel came out in nineteen-ninty-fucking-eight, and the limited edition release that came with the video has well and truly sold out, even with our meagre sales rate. Nevertheless, you should king-hit the guy for being a tool of the man, and smash several states whilst you’re about it. Cheers, Lindsay.


Frenzal,
How can I obtain the classic demo cassette you did with "Phil" and "You Only Like Me When Your Stoned" on it? I stole it from a dead junkie when I lived in Bucknell St., but can't find the bastard of a thing now.You can buy all other recordings at shops and shit but have never scene the demo songs. If youse can find the time let me know, thanks for reading this-theButcher.

Ahh, the age-old question. There’s a couple of them sitting on the shelf behind me, at Frenzal HQ, but I’m not allowed to touch them. Surely you can find some filthy wino with stained pants and half a dreadlock left on his head hanging around Wilson street who still has a copy. Or did your dad lose his too?

Dear Frenzal,

Which one of u guys has the biggest hard on for madge bishop?

Regards,
Chachi

Dearest Chachi. Neighbours is a tv show. It’s not real. Please get over it. We’ve all got hard-ons for Alf, from that Reality program Home and Away. Cheers, Lindsay.

Hello.
Can anyone tell me where i can get pictures of your bassist, if possible from when you played in the UK on your tour with the dropkicks. He's hot!!!!

Cam
xxx

Dearest Cam. Obviously you suffer from some form of mild retardation, so I’ll be nice. Click on the link below, and there’s some nice pictures of Tommy.

http://photobucket.com/albums/v48/DoctorLindemans/Frenzal%20Live%20Nonsense/

or else, you can go to www.frenzalrhomb.com.au and enjoy yourself there. Cheers, Lindsay

dear lindsay or gordy. We are three peice punk band and we're not very good. BUT we would like some inspiration what is a good topic to write a song about AND we would like to play with u sometime at a local show. u guys rock even though u suck. and we have met u so we have special priveleges. had my third joint the other day...good stuff eh
Cheers!
Connor, ABC


Now Connor, whilst I don’t doubt for a minute that a person of your superior intelligence does in fact work at the ABC, I do wonder why you haven’t used your position on influence in the Government Broadcaster to shoot your band to the top of the charts. Maybe after that third joint, you’re too stoned. Cheers, Lindsay.

Dear Lindsay,
My wife thinks to be a real man you must get in a 15 man pub fight. Is this true? Can i be saved cause im a fucking pussy! Shall i sign the divorce papers or pick up my favourite bar stool?

Please Help

Cheers from inna pickle

Dear Inna, if that is indeed your real name. I think you misheard your wife. To be a real man you must get in a 15 man pub FUCK. That’s what she meant, and I’ll see you and 13 mates down the townie this Friday night, we’ll make a man of you yet. Cheers, Lindsay.